Murder Lo Mein Page 16

  “They’re Sun Tzu quotes,” I told him.

  His eyes narrowed. “Sun Tzu quotes…?”

  “Yeah, you know … The Art of War.”

  “Huh, well, that’s a first for me. Does that have any significance to either one of you?”

  I sighed. “Well, clearly the one I got means that I’m next on the chopping block. But no … I don’t know what using Sun Tzu quotes means. If it meant anything to Norman, he didn’t say so. Stella had no idea what it was about. She didn’t even recognize the quote.”

  “Wait, you got one too?” Ian asked, stepping in front of Adam. He grabbed my shoulders and lightly shook me. “Lana, what have you gotten yourself into?”

  “Why don’t you let me worry about that?” Adam removed Ian’s hand from my left shoulder. “I’m not going to let anything happen to her.”

  “I should certainly hope not.” Ian removed his other hand and turned to face Adam head-on. “You’ll have hell to pay.”

  “Is that so?” Adam straightened his back and lifted his chin. “And what exactly are you going to do about it, Sung?”

  Ian snickered. “Oh, I don’t mean me, Detective. I’m talking about Mrs. Lee.”

  * * *

  We’d barely spoken on the way back to my apartment. Adam was deep in thought and not willing to share. In the passing streetlights I would catch a glimpse of his expression. His face was hardened, his jaw clenched.

  Megan was still at work, so it was only Kikko that met us at the door. Adam gave her a pat on the head before he slumped onto the couch. He leaned his head back and scrubbed his face with both hands. Since the beginning of the evening a five o’clock shadow had appeared and there were dark circles under his eyes.

  “Do you want some coffee? I could make some,” I offered.

  “No, I should try and get to sleep. Tomorrow is going to be another long day.”

  “Oh, okay. Well, I can walk you out, I’ll bring the dog.”

  He snickered. “First of all, that little wrinkle of a pooch isn’t going to protect you from a rabid squirrel. And second of all, I’m spending the night. There’s no way I’m letting you out of my sight. I’ll try and get some police detail on you tomorrow, but for tonight, I’ll be your guard.”

  My eyes widened. He was staying the night? He hadn’t stayed the night since … well, since the last time I got myself into trouble.

  With the way our schedules kept conflicting with one another, there hadn’t been any time for cozy sleepovers or long evenings that carried into early morning. We’d only been on a handful of dates in the time that we’d been seeing each other.

  “That’s okay with you, right?” he asked when I didn’t say anything.

  “Yeah, I just … have to walk the dog.” I grabbed for Kikko’s leash and fastened it onto her collar. “Come on, Kikko.” I rushed out the door before he could offer to come along. I needed a moment to myself.

  Outside I took a deep breath while Kikko sniffed around a fire hydrant. Adam was going to spend the night. He’d never offered to spend the night, or asked, or suggested that I spend the night at his place. I’d never even been to his place. Everything so far had been very much innocent. And since I was shaky about getting involved with someone too fast, it had been fine by me.

  My mind was racing. Did I have acceptable pajamas to wear that didn’t involve a T-shirt with a stupid saying on it? Had I remembered to shave my legs? Would I snore and keep him awake? Would he snore and keep me awake? It had been a long while since I’d shared a bed with anyone other than Kikko, and I was starting to feel like I was out of practice at being in an adult relationship. Were we even in a relationship? What was this?

  Breathe, Lana. It’s going to be okay.

  When I got back inside, I found Adam sprawled on the couch. His demeanor had changed from the car ride and he appeared to have relaxed a little bit. Lying on his back, he’d kicked his shoes off and had his head propped up with his arms. He watched me while I removed the dog’s leash and hung my keys on the brass hooks hanging by the door.

  It suddenly occurred to me that he might intend on sleeping on the couch like the last time he stayed. I started to feel silly for even considering that we would both sleep in my bed.

  “I hope you’re not a blanket hog,” he said with a wry grin. “My feet turn into icicles while I sleep.”

  My stomach leaped into my throat. “No, I don’t think I do—”

  He seemed to sense my anxiety. “I can sleep out here if that would make you more comfortable.”

  “No!” I said a little too eagerly. I tucked my chin in. “I mean … of course not. Don’t be silly.”

  He laughed. “You seem a little jittery there. You okay? I know this whole thing with the fortune cookie can’t be easy.”

  “Yeah, I’m just going to straighten up my room a little bit, and then we can go to … bed.”

  In one swift motion, he was up from the couch and at my side. His arm looped around my waist and he pulled me down on the couch, nestling me into his side. The heat from his body seeped through my shirt. “Sit with me a minute, okay?”

  “Okay.” I could hear the nerves shaking my vocal chords. Why are you such a spaz when it comes to him, Lana?

  “This is kind of important, and I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you this … but I don’t think the right time is ever going to present itself.”

  My stomach dropped. He really wasn’t helping me relax. One of the worst feelings in the world is when someone tells you they have to tell you something … at least for me. My natural instinct is to think of the worst-case scenario. And, in this case, it was that he didn’t want to be involved with me anymore.

  “If you don’t want to see me anymore…” My bottom lip quivered with the words. Secretly, I’d been thinking it for weeks. And now with this whole thing going on, and me getting myself into trouble yet again, I could see him being completely fed up with me and my shenanigans.

  “How can you say that, Lana? I wouldn’t be here right now if I didn’t want to be.” He squeezed my shoulder.

  “You’re just doing your job,” I suggested. “You’re here to make sure nothing happens to me.”

  “Sweetheart, I hate to break it to you; this is a little above and beyond the call of duty. So no, it’s not that I don’t want to see you anymore.”

  I took a deep breath trying to calm my nerves.

  “But there is something you need to know about me…”

  My stomach sank yet again. My mind went down the list to the next possible worst-case scenario. “Oh my God, you’re married, aren’t you?” I shifted away from him and stuck my hands between my knees. Things started to make sense … the distant behavior and lack of communication, it all started to come together. “I should have known. A handsome guy like you wouldn’t be single. And that explains why I’ve never been to your place … oh my God, it explains so much.” I looked at his hands. “Why don’t you wear a ring? And—”

  “Lana!” Adam put his hands on my shoulders and turned me to face him again. “I’m not married.”

  “Oh…” My face reddened.

  “The reason why we haven’t spent much time together…” His hands dropped from my shoulders. He rested his elbows on his knees and steepled his fingers in front of his face. “The reason that we haven’t…”

  My heart was beating and I could feel the pulse thick in my throat. Whatever he needed to say was clearly difficult for him. I’d never seen him act this way before. I inched myself closer to him and rested a comforting hand on his thigh. “You can tell me anything,” I assured him. “I’m not going to judge you.”

  He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath through his nose. “When I was little … I was eight … I lost my dad. He was … murdered…”

  An involuntary gasp escaped my throat. “What?”

  His eyes opened, and when he turned to me, I noticed they were bloodshot. “He was killed during a robbery at a gas station.”

 
I didn’t know what to say. The words I’m sorry felt like they wouldn’t do the subject matter justice. I gave his thigh a gentle squeeze and decided to stay silent, letting him finish what he wanted to say.

  “At the time, there had been a string of gas station robberies happening in the area. They would take everything in the cash register, kill the owner, and shoot out the cameras.”

  “Oh my … that’s terrible…”

  “We were on our way out of town. My parents and I were headed to Marblehead for the weekend, and we stopped to get gas. My father went inside to pay and get snacks while we waited in the car.”

  I covered my mouth, stifling another gasp. How horrible! Adam had been there when his father was killed. I couldn’t imagine what that would do to a person, especially someone so young.

  “When I heard the gunshots, my mother told me to get down and hide on the floor in the backseat. The next thing I remembered was people yelling and tires peeling out as they took off. Sirens were going off in the distance…” He stared at the door of the apartment, his eyes glazed over. I knew that he was imagining it all over again in his head. I knew that he was there.

  My heart sank, and I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. “You don’t have to—”

  He held up a hand. “No, just let me get this out. I need to do this.

  “I stayed there like that until the cops came … I remember my mother trying to get me out of the car. But I couldn’t move. One of the first responders was finally able to convince me to get off the floor of the backseat. My father never came back out to the car … I already knew he was dead without my mother having to explain anything to me.

  “When they finally got me out of the car, they took us to the police station and tried to question us, but we hadn’t seen anything that could help them. I didn’t even notice any of the other cars in the parking spots or at the pumps and neither did she. They never did catch the guys who did it.

  “After that, my mother and I went to live with my grandparents and they helped raise me. Things were rough on my mother for a long while, but our family helped keep us together. I don’t know what we would have done without them.

  “That’s why I became a cop. I might not have been able to get justice for myself or my family. But I wanted to get justice for others…” He glanced up at me. “And that’s also why I’ve been avoiding your question for so long. Not many people know about what happened. The guys at the station know, and I suppose anyone who dug into my past would know, but I don’t make it a point to tell people.”

  “Adam … I’m so sorry…” I said the words even though they made me cringe. I needed words with more power, more feeling.

  “If we’re going to go any further with this, it’s important that you know this about me. I come with baggage, Lana. I come with a lot of mental baggage. It destroyed my last relationship. She couldn’t deal with how protective I could become. One night … she didn’t come home and I had cops searching for her everywhere. I was losing my mind trying to find her.”

  “Where was she?”

  He smirked. “Turns out she was cheating on me. She was at the other guy’s place that night. Said she needed a man who treated her like a grown woman. Apparently, all my worrying made her feel like a child.”

  “Ugh … that…” Again, I found myself at a loss for words.

  “I know you know that feeling. We talked about it when we first met.”

  “I remember.” He was referring to the story I’d told him about my previous relationship and the unshakeable feeling that stays with you after someone you trust cheats on you.

  “So … yeah…” He laced his fingers together. “You’re always worrying about me not wanting to be with you … you don’t say so, but I know it. I can see it on your face. The look of insecurity you’ll get … or the tone in your voice when I tell you I can’t make a date because of a case. It’s not a line, Lana … it’s the truth.”

  “I know.” It came out as a whisper.

  “And, I really do worry about you.”

  “I know,” I said again. “I also know now why it affects you so much.”

  “Loss scars you … deeply,” he said, looking into my eyes, no doubt trying to read my mind. “I don’t want any more loss … I know that’s not reasonable…”

  “There’s nothing wrong with having hope.”

  “In my head, you’re my girl. I think from the minute I saw you come out of those double doors, I knew … you’re my girl. I’ve tried to hold on to that moment … I’ve tried to keep you at a safe distance so I wouldn’t lose you. But I realize we can’t stay in that space forever. It’s not realistic.”

  My insides were screaming. This was a completely different side of Adam, one that I’d never seen. For all the times we’d spent together, I knew that more was going on in his head, but I never knew that it could be all this. From the moment we’d met, I had never been sure how he’d felt about me and now I’d learned what was holding him back.

  “So … the real question is … do you still want to be with me?” As he asked the question, he transformed from a grown man full of confidence and assurance to a little boy with his heart on his sleeve. His eyes were filled with doubt and apprehension as he waited for me to answer.

  I propped myself up on my knees and wiggled myself close to him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders. He leaned into me, his head resting on my shoulder. I kissed the top of his head. “Of course I do. You’re my guy, Adam. Baggage and all.”

  CHAPTER

  23

  When I awoke, Adam was sitting on the edge of the bed staring out the window through the half-opened blinds with Kikko by his side. She stared at him waiting for action.

  “Whatcha doin?” I shifted under the blanket, propping myself up with my elbow.

  “I hope I didn’t wake you,” he said over his shoulder. “I didn’t sleep that great.”

  “Because of our conversation from last night?” Even though I’d been exhausted from the emotional evening we’d shared, it was hard to fall asleep. I’d spent at least thirty minutes reciting the alphabet over and over in my head.

  “No, this fortune-cookie thing has me stumped. I don’t like that feeling.”

  I hoisted myself up and leaned against the wall. “Probably you’re thinking about it too hard. Try focusing on something else and maybe the fortune-cookie angle will come to you.”

  He stood up and paced the length of the room. “But why Sun Tzu … why the Art of War? If it didn’t mean anything to Stella, then what was the purpose? Had it meant something to Norman Pan? Why did he take the fortune to Ian of all people?”

  Kikko followed him with her eyes.

  “Well, whoever it is, obviously they’re declaring some type of war.”

  “War on what? The contest? And why go to all this trouble?”

  “It has to mean something to them and they just don’t realize it,” I suggested. “Or maybe the guy is just a fan of Sun Tzu.”

  “Or woman,” Adam shot back.

  “True…” My thoughts swirled back to Penny Cho. “Whoever it was must have wanted the victims to know who they were in advance.”

  He turned to me. “Yeah, but then how does that relate to you? Does anything strike you as odd about this Sun Tzu angle at all?”

  I shook my head. “It doesn’t ring any bells with me.”

  “Then there’s a different message here … some type of connection to the other fortunes that were given out.”

  Throwing the blanket off me, I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and stuffed my feet into the fuzzy slippers Megan gave me last Christmas. “If we’re going to talk motives, I need coffee.”

  “I should head into the station. I need to check in with the chief and talk this out with him. And I need to enter this stuff into evidence. I could get into some serious trouble for not bringing this in right away.”

  “Just tell them you didn’t get any of it until this morning.”

  Adam wrapped an
arm around my waist as I stood. “Miss Lee, are you trying to make a liar out of me?”

  “No, but I don’t want you to lose your job either.”

  “The sentiment is much appreciated.” He gave me a kiss on the forehead. “Listen, there’s something I want to talk about with you before I leave.”

  “Okay…”

  He pulled me over to the bed, and we sat on the edge, facing each other. “I’ve been thinking about our conversation from last night.”

  I couldn’t say that I was surprised, my own mind was replaying the whole evening from top to bottom. Part of me was still processing everything.

  He scrubbed his chin with the back of his hand. “I don’t want to make the same mistakes I’ve made in the past and end up pushing you away. I know I have to let you make your own decisions.”

  I wrapped my hand around his bicep and gave him a reassuring squeeze. “I know you know that. I don’t look at your protection and concern as a burden. But I do need you to trust that I’m capable too.”

  He nodded. “Can you promise me one thing?”

  “Anything.”

  “We always make it a point to communicate. If you’re getting into something, I want you to tell me. It’s better that I know about it than you going behind my back.”

  “But aren’t you just going to tell me to stay out of it?” I asked.

  Adam smiled. “Yeah, but when have you ever listened to me?”

  After he left, I tiptoed around getting ready for work so I wouldn’t disturb Megan. I hadn’t heard her come in and that meant it must have been pretty late.

  Before Adam left, he’d called the station and asked one of his buddies to come keep an eye on me until I made it safely to the plaza. When I was letting out Kikko for her morning tinkle, I saw an unmarked car parked at the end of the lot. A middle-aged man with aviator glasses watched me as I circled the grassy area with Kikko. It was Officer Wilkins, the same guy who’d questioned me the night of Norman’s murder. From what I could see, he was dressed in plainclothes and there was nothing to give away the fact he was a cop. His sandy-blond hair was tousled and the beard that was beginning to form made it seem like he’d just gotten out of bed. I waved at him, but he pretended not to see me, turning his head in the other direction.